Compassion. Spontaneity. Intelligence. Passion.

A person is a collection of parts. Sometimes you only let certain people see certain parts. There are some people who get to see the genuinely compassionate side of you. Others get to see the spontaneous  side. There are those who get to see the intellectual you and then there are the few that get to see how passionate you can be. When you focus on showing only one characteristic of yourself, you tend to forget the other traits and the trait you are focusing on multiplies and elevates itself to an exaggerated level. That is why certain people in your life tend to see you differently than others in your life.

But once and a while, you let someone see all of these traits at the same time. And even though you are not focusing on an individual trait, you let them see each one of these traits to the fullest degree. You give them the best of you.

When you find this person it is scary to let them see every part of you. Does this person recognize that they get to see the best of me? Do they know how lucky they are? Are they grateful? Do they love all of me or only certain parts of me? Are they ready to take on the responsibility of knowing all of me?

And then, with very little notice, your world is shattered. You no longer can focus the best of you on one person. You have to lets the broken pieces of you get scattered across the universe. You focus all your compassion on a stranger. Your intelligence is wasted on the blogosphere. Your passion is lost in a sea of meaningless. Your spontaneity leads you to leads you to the dead end of regret. 

You can call it a rebound. You can call it a loss of identity. But whatever it is, one day I will be able to find another person who I feel deserves to see the best of all of me.